Esther Study: Week 5

Reading: Esther chapter 5; Ephesians 5:22-33
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Commentaries:

v1: Picture the scene. Esther, dressed in her best, terrified and starving after a 3 day fast, approaching the throne while onlookers gasped at her audacity in approaching the king uninvited. She keeps her eyes on her husband and...

v2: ...his eyes met hers. See a marriage that's broken down into rituals and protocol. For Xerxes to extend his scepter was to risk gossip of his inability to control his second wife. Perhaps intrigued by her boldness in a court where everyone grovelled to him, Xerxes does so anyways.

v3: Time out. Xerxes is the kind of man who ignores his wife for weeks on end, anyone really believe he would give her half his kingdom? Xerxes was not speaking literally, Herod made the exact same offer (Mark 6:23). Although kings are honour bound to keep their promise and grant whatever boon is asked of them, they offer half their kingdom to give the appearance of generosity while expecting nobody (queens included) to actually dare ask it of them.

v4: Why invite Haman? One VERY interesting theory: Esther purposefully invited Haman to both intimate dinners with her husband to make Xerxes jealous of his adviser (who's NOT a eunuch =P). The theory is not without merit, as we'll see in ch 7. Remember, Esther is going up against the king's favoured adviser. This move effectively predisposes the king to distrust Haman and lays the groundwork for her accusations to be heard the next day. Devious. I like, I like.

v5: One might think the king ignored his wife for 30 days because he was busy. Yet he actually seemed rather bored here, and immediately drops everything at the mention of a feast. Guy's just lazy. >=(

v6: The way to a man's heart (and mind) is through his stomach. Your humble devotional writer shamefully attests to the truth of these words.

v7-8: Esther promises to ask her favour the next day and by now the king was curious enough to play along with her little games. She had the FULL attention of her normally distracted husband. In the words of one commentator, "Esther began as if she were going to state her petition but then broke off and instead invited the king and Haman to another banquet...in my opinion, the clever way in which she induces the king virtually to grant her request before he knows what it is suggests that she knows full well what she is doing."

v9: There are at least two reasons why Haman switched from happy to angry so quickly. The first was his bitter hatred towards Mordecai. Haman expected Mordecai to plead for the life of his people dressed in the rumored sackcloth, yet finds his dignity unbroken. This drove him nuts. Hatred and resentment ruins happiness.

v10: "[Haman], there are two kinds of angry people - explosive and implosive. Explosive is the type of individual you see screaming at the cashier for not taking his coupon. Implosive is the cashier who remains quiet day after day and then finally shoots everyone in the store. You're the cashier." - Dr. Buddy Rydell (Jack Nicholson), Anger Management.

v11-13: The second reason for Haman's rapid mood swing is the flimsy foundations on which his happiness is based: possessions, status, and people to brag to. Transient, pride-based happiness springs quickly from good fortune but evaporates at the first sign of trouble or disappointment. It is not solid nor lasting.

v14: Evil men gather evil friends (and wives). They actually sympathized with Haman's pathetic grudge and self pity. More than that, they casually suggested murder just so his merriment would go unmarred that evening. Also note the arrogance in the words "tell the king." Haman viewed the king as either a puppet or a genie, not an entirely inaccurate assumption.
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Reflection:

Xerxes didn't know how to communicate with his wife so he relied on formulas and protocols. Have you ever noticed how relying on sterile routines instead of living communication can slowly rot a relationship of vitality?

The king twice offered to grant her wish, and was even slightly tipsy the second time, why didn't Esther make her request?

Ever had a happy mood ruined because of something trivial? Is it ever because of a begrudging resentment or pride-based happiness as were the case with Haman? What are some solid things to base happiness/joy on?

Ever notice how a grudge stays on your mind? Having our thoughts completely preoccupied with someone is never healthy, be the thoughts negative OR positive. How might either case be bad for us?

One recurring theme in the book of Esther is bad advice; unwise, quick fixes to complex problems. Contrast the advice Mordecai gave to Esther with the advice Zeresh offers her husband. What are the differences? Which side do the advices you offer typically fall?

Through wisdom and patience rather than loud demands; Esther captured the full attention of her normally distracted husband and, as we'll see in two weeks, won him over to her point of view. How does Esther's method exemplify Paul's exhortation for Christian wives (Ephesian 5:22-24) to encourage their husbands and to respectfully offer them advice and guidance while allowing them to lead? Granted that Esther's context and ours are vastly different, but how might this principle be practically lived out in our rights-obsessed culture of gender equality?
[Realizing that I tread dangerously thin ice, might I humbly suggest one practical scenario for your consideration? There is a HUGE difference between a wife asking her husband if he'd be willing to pray with her about the spiritual needs/condition of their kids versus another who demands to know why he doesn't lead the family's spiritual growth. Both women share the same desire, for the man to engage in the family's spiritual well being. One woman approached the disengaged husband with a gentle, guiding reminder that is likely to invite genuine concern and questions like "What's wrong with junior?" While the demanding attitude of the second is likely to incite an angry/defensive response by which the husband hopes to retain the dignity he feels his wife is denying him.]